- Court: "Happy Holidays" Just As Offensive As "Merry Christmas"
Martha Throebeck, December 12, 2005
This isn't just a slippery slope, it's a vertical cliff!
- Redbirds Ripoff: The World's Most Expensive Garage Sale
James Baughn, November 27, 2005
The Cardinals care about their fans... money
- I Hate To Gloat, But...
James Baughn, November 14, 2005
Despite the seriousness of the rioting in France, it's hard not to smile.
- Kansas Suffering From Serious Inferiority Complex
James Baughn, October 3, 2005
There's no reason to emulate California.
- Never Time Tales Presents: Them-There Giants
William Palmer, September 21, 2005
A story about giants -- or, to be politically correct, vertically unchallenged lifeforms
- PORK = Projects Organized for Receiving Kickbacks
James Baughn, August 13, 2005
Compassionate conservatism is just another name for "tax-and-spend".
- The Solution to Chicago Corruption
James Baughn, August 8, 2005
We should use surveillance machines to put an end to political machines.
- Rated 'T' For Tyrant
James Baughn, August 4, 2005
We face a far greater threat than violent video games
- Local Man Discovers Elusive "Paducah Shortcut"
Martha Throebeck, July 19, 2005
But is this all a hoax?
- Racial Bigots Ecstatic Over Supreme Court Ruling
Martha Throebeck, June 25, 2005
Segregation is legal again, thanks to the Supreme Court.
- Local Baseball Player "Fails" Drug Test
Martha Throebeck, May 31, 2005
This player is obviously not ready for the big leagues.
- The Courtship Of A Lady And A Sir
William Palmer, May 23, 2005
And now for something completely different...
- Gov. Blunt Is Playing With Fire [Updated 5/18]
James Baughn, May 1, 2005
In order to save money now, the state could be opening itself up to massive lawsuits in the future.
- A Rebuttal To The Cry-Me-A-River Campus
James Baughn, May 9, 2005
The college won't get any donations from this graduate. Period.
- Newsflash: Scientists Discover Person With "Ideal Body Weight"
Martha Throebeck, April 25, 2005
It's obviously an aberration.
- We Now Have Three Regular Readers!
Martha Throebeck, April 1, 2005
At this rate, we'll achieve world domination in the year 3,109,412,911,191 A.D.
- Nobody Notices Ten Commandments Display At Missouri Capitol
Martha Throebeck, March 23, 2005
It's just not that important.
- City Council Drops Plan To Turn Downtown Into Giant Roundabout
Martha Throebeck, March 21, 2005
Did somebody just say the 'R' word?
- Police Realize Student Is Member Of Football Team, Drop Charges
Martha Throebeck, March 11, 2005
Because an athlete is a horrible thing to waste.
- Cape Cheesecake Cartel Crumbles
Martha Throebeck, March 2, 2005
This menace to society has finally been eliminated.
- Letter: We Should Support Tart Reform
Cass A. Nova, February 13, 2005
If it works for Nevada and the Netherlands, it can work for us.
- Democrats: Global Warming Is A Red-State Conspiracy
Martha Throebeck, February 10, 2005
Rising tides will take out the Blue States first.
- City Warns Against "Killer Goose" At Capaha Park
Martha Throebeck, February 7, 2005
It might look cute, but don't turn your back on it for even a minute!
- Genealogist Discovers Lack Of Inbreeding In Family Tree
Martha Throebeck, January 10, 2005
She feels so... ashamed.
- Burn Your Way To Health
Martha Throebeck, January 9, 2005
You'll lose weight with this plan for sure -- but you'll also lose your ability to taste anything
